| Inside Full Circle |
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Chapter 1 Sighing, Sara Rebstock looked at the heavy traffic waiting for the light to change. How long before she could get out of her condo’s driveway, she wondered? To gauge her chances of anyone likely to give her that opportunity, she glanced at the lead car. To her surprise, she saw the driver staring at her. Something about him made her tense. Then the light changed and he gestured to come ahead. Amazed at this unexpected courtesy, she waved her thanks. But as she pulled in front of him, she could not believe her eyes. Above an all-too-familiar face sat a jaunty cap, similar to one that Kyle, her long-deceased husband, often wore. Shocked and completely unprepared, she burst into tears. Unable to stop crying, she turned at the next corner and parked on a quiet street. Early that evening she phoned her daughter, hoping Emma would be home from her law office, and not out for dinner with her husband. To Sara’s relief, she answered on the second ring. “Hello.” Instinctively, Sara knew Emma’s voice did not have quite its customary lilt. But her own need to talk took precedence over her usual motherly concern. “Hello, yourself. I’m so glad you’re there.” She took a deep breath. “You’ll never guess what happened to me today.” “Tell me.” Sara quickly related her experience, then waited for Emma’s reaction. It was not at all what she expected. “You’ll never guess what happened to me,” she replied. “What?” “I stopped at the grocery store on my way home. And I’m sure I saw Dad.” “What?” “Some people were sitting down in a corner where you can have a coke, or coffee. One of them looked like Dad, so I went up and down the aisles two or three times to try to look at him, without being noticed. ” “Did you speak to him?” “No, I really didn’t know what to do.” Emma sounded tired. “I guess I thought he might be a double. Just the other night there was a TV show about everyone having a double. I still remember what he looked like, even though it was a long time ago.” “I should have let him pass me so that I could see him better,” Sara said, regretfully. “But I was so shaken I couldn’t stay in line.” “Well, it has to have been a double. Dad’s been dead for twenty years.” Missing, anyway, Sara thought. The next day, she still felt disturbed by the two unexpected events and unable to settle to anything. But the beautiful day should be enjoyed after the long, mid-west winter, she knew. Perhaps a walk through the park just a few blocks away would help. However, the purple crocuses, bright yellow daffodils, budding trees, and the soft sounds of a flowing stream now free of ice, did not arouse optimism in Sara, as they usually did each spring. The memory of that brief glance from someone who so resembled her husband kept returning to trouble her. Now that the wound had been opened again, how did she really feel about him? A bench in the path of the sunshine looked inviting so she sat down and let the warm rays fall on her face. Soon her thoughts drifted back over the years to when she and Kyle Rebstock met in college. They had been strongly attracted and went together for a year, before he flunked out. His disgusted father insisted he find work to pay for the repeated year. Since high school, Sara had always had a summer job at the reception desk of the family brewery. From the very beginning, she had been told by her father, Charles Streicher, that although he was president of the brewery, she would have to perform well if she wanted to keep her job. When Kyle had no luck job-hunting, she persuaded her father to give him a job in the plant, too. Reluctant at first, he finally agreed but cautioned both of them that the foreman, who had been there thirty-five years, would stand for no nonsense. With Sara’s encouragement, Kyle saved his money and repeated his senior year at the local branch of the state university. After graduation, he got a job as a salesman for a malt company, which entailed his calling on Sara’s father. Though still skeptical about Kyle, he finally gave in to Sara’s pleading and offered him a permanent job in Accounting. After a few months, Kyle proposed. Sara accepted with such joy that even the teasing about his marrying the boss’ daughter did not bother her. After a year, Emma was born. Two months later, Sara’s parents were killed when the train they were on derailed. Being the only child, Sara inherited her father’s shares. The remainder belonged to his brother, Vincent, and a male cousin, Louis. All three, plus the brewery’s accountant and a banker-friend of Vincent’s were on the Board of Directors. When Sara took her father’s place as president, Louis was less than pleased. It was Vincent, her uncle, who insisted that Sara had that right. An affable and warm man, he had been the one who comforted her most when her parents died. On the contrary, Louis, a bachelor in his fifties, had never been a favorite of Sara’s. For one thing, his appearance offended her. Usually, he came to the monthly Board meetings in well-worn slacks and a short-sleeved sport shirt that hung loosely over his large stomach. Nor did his usual two or three-day beard, sprouting more hair than his head, help make him acceptable. Family members and brewery workers were of little interest to him; hunting and fishing were all that seemed important. When he did work-all the while whining that he had to do it to augment his small income from the brewery-it would be a part-time job guiding other fishermen and hunters. Completely lost in thought about those early days, Sara suddenly became aware being too warm and removed her jacket. But she soon realized her discomfort was not entirely due to the sunshine. Two upsetting memories had returned to disturb her. The first was of her growing awareness that Kyle extended his charm only to those who might be of use to him, or who had lots of money. In his day-to-day association with the brewery workers he had an arrogant way about him, something completely unacceptable in the hundred years her family had owned the brewery. The second was more important. She had begun to sense Kyle’s waning interest in her. Hoping to stem the tide, she told the Board she wanted her husband to be the new president of the brewery. Louis snorted, “What the hell does he know about running a business?” “Don’t you think he needs more experience in the brewery first?” Vincent asked, gently. In a tone that brooked no argument and which even surprised herself, Sara said firmly, “We have a good office staff, and the brewmaster has been here for years. Kyle meets outside people well and that’s good for bringing in business. I have faith in him and I want him at the helm.” At first, Kyle almost courted her again, even sending flowers, and calling her on the phone often to tell her he loved her. At the same time, he took to his new position with great enthusiasm, joining groups he said would help promote their beer and going to meetings of various civic organizations. If Sara complained about all his involvements that took him away many evenings, his stock reply was, “Don’t you think your father would want me to make a success of the brewery?” “The brewery did all right when I was growing up, and I don’t remember he was out so much,” she would reply, unhappily. One time, when he was ready to go out the door for yet another meeting, Sara lost control. “You’re out all the time.” She began to sob. “And . . . you never want to make love anymore.” “I’m tired, damn it,” he flung back. “Don’t you ever think about that? I’m doing my best and all you do is nag.” Sara did not bring the subject up again, but she began to wonder whether there could be someone else. That suspicion was fueled by an experience when Emma was five years old, and had to have one of her upper front teeth pulled. Feeling uneasy about having her little girl undergo this ordeal, for no doubt it would frighten her, she phoned Kyle to ask if he would go with them. “Oh, I can’t leave just now,” he said quickly. “I’m in the midst of showing a new office employee the ropes.” “Can’t someone else do that?” “Not really. She’s just completed a business course and I want her to thoroughly understand our office routine.” Disappointed, but concerned for Emma, she put on a cheerful front and they drove downtown without him. The dentist was kind, and everything went well. But after it was over and they were driving home, Sara wondered why Kyle would be giving so much attention to a mere office employee, and decided to see for herself. “Why don’t we stop at the brewery and show Daddy where your tooth used to be?” she asked Emma, who now looked more relaxed. “Uh, huh,” she agreed, her smile clearly revealing the empty space. Sara parked in an empty space at the side of the office, formerly the home of her great grandparents, and opened the car door to help Emma get out. Together they went into the main office where a pleasant middle-aged woman sat behind the large reception desk. She and Sara had become friendly over the many summers that she, too, worked in the office. “Hello, Shirley. Is my husband in?” she asked, looking at the closed door on the opposite side of the room. “Yes, he is, Sara,” she said, and quickly turned her attention to Emma. “And who is this nice little girl?” Emma smiled back at her. “Look at me,” she said proudly, putting her finger on her upper gum. “Oh, my goodness.” Dorothy sounded properly impressed. “You must have been to the dentist.” “We have been,” Sara said, “and now we want to surprise her Daddy and show him how she looks.” With that, she walked over to Kyle’s door and opened it without knocking. She surprised him, all right. And she, too, was surprised. Or was she, completely? A young blonde woman in a tight sweater with low-cut neckline was stooping over Kyle, looking at an open ledger on his littered desk. Her arm lay alongside his as she pointed to something on the page. At the sound of the door opening, they both looked up. “Daddy,” squealed Emma, running over to him, “look at my toof. It’s gone.” “Let’s see, sweetheart,” her father said, scooping her up in his arms. “So it is. Oh, Sara, this is Pamela, who has just recently joined us.” “Hello, Pamela,” Sara managed to say pleasantly, fully aware that Kyle had neglected to say, “This is my wife.” Green eyes regarded her from a cold expressionless face so taut it flashed through Sara’s mind that perhaps a tuck had been taken here and there. Then acknowledging her boss’ wife with a nod, and showing no interest in his little girl, Pamela gathered up the ledger and went out. Her appalling lack of manners startled Sara. She must be good at office work, she rationalized. But on the way home she couldn’t help wondering what else she might be good at. However, she didn’t bring up the subject then or at any time later, mainly because over the next few months Kyle’s habits did not seem to change. He still went to many evening business meetings. Saturdays, he went shopping, something he liked to do and often took Emma with him. On Sundays, he read the morning paper and watched sports on TV in the afternoon. So one day, when he off-handedly told Sara that Pamela had given notice, because of a better job offer, it left her with the feeling she must have over-reacted. Depressed by the memories, Sara got to her feet and started walking back to her condo. Would it have been better to let Kyle find his own answers, she asked herself once again, instead of my involving him in the brewery? It was an easier solution at the time, but perhaps he should have been forced to find his own way. Then he might have matured more, and things would have worked out differently. We’ll never know. She sighed. Anymore than we’ll ever know what really happened to him. |